On Thursday night a discussion broke out at Daily Cannon Towers about whether your wonderful editorial team might like to cover football topics away from Arsenal.

I missed the majority of this discussion as I was blowing out of, er, both ends having struggled, one eyed (I lost a contact lens early on), through my weekly Spursday night football match.

When I caught up with it all, I was sort of incredulous.

Here were a group of Arsenal fans, who all love writing about the Arsenal (albeit, less so this week), talking about writing about other teams.

I don’t get it.

Even if you’re only writing about Tottenham Hotspur so you can be mean about their cup final party pack– yes, I have seen this- why waste the energy? Without wanting to come across as a bit of a James Blunt, as I get older I find that time moves so bloody quickly, that it’s become increasingly precious to me and I don’t have the energy to try and think of Full Kit John Terry gags.

What’s the point of it?

Or, put another way, why waste negative metal energy on teams you couldn’t give a damn about when you’ve got Arsenal to moan at? We, after all, are not Spurs fans, you’ll have noticed a lot of them on the site recently.

Clearly, they’ve got nothing better to do- like work, for example.

I guess the key thing for me is that as I’ve got older I’ve also realised that, to bastardise a joke from Fever Pitch, I’m not a football fan, I’m an Arsenal fan.

Therefore, the idea of watching to football teams I have no interest in doing battle has no appeal whatsoever to me and even less so writing about them.

Liverpool v Manchester United maybe one of the most watched fixtures, if not the most watched, in the world but to me the idea of watching Stevie Me and the Granny Shagger doing battle has all the appeal of drinking a pint of vomit (YouTube it).

Maybe it’s that approach that saw me so blithely predict a comfortable 3-1 win for Arsenal on Wednesday night. Then again, I didn’t see too many experts expecting anything other than an Arsenal success not that I have ever claimed to be an expert.

The thing is, as Arsenal fans we’ve all got used to horrible things happening to our team and so we expect them to happen to other teams and maybe that’s why you and, sometimes, I watch.

Oddly enough, this approach has had mixed results over the last week and a half.

Barely ten seconds after I flicked on Chelsea’s game with PSG last week- just to see the score, you understand– Cavani headed PSG’s equaliser.

By the same token, this week I flicked on ITV just in time to see the usually reliable Zabaleta upend Messi to give the his countryman the chance to all but knock City out after 90 minutes of a 180 minute tie.

How I laughed.

And then he missed.

After Arsenal’s “performance” on Wednesday night, I’ve spent a large part of the last two working days asking colleagues to explain to me what an “Arsenal” is.

“Arsenal? No never heard of that, what is it? Something to do with an artillery, no?”

My point is, watching football that doesn’t involve your team is, in a way, even more pointless than watching Arsenal and expecting them not to do something really, really stupid.

You’re looking for schadenfreude.

Incidentally, I’m sure it’s the continued search for pleasure in other people’s misfortunes which has seen my Nan hit her 93rd year without even a hint that she might soon be off to the Great Gig in the Sky. So, I get the concept and, like my Nan, I also enjoy a bit of it myself.

But, I’m sorry guys, when it comes to the kind of stupidness with which a football team drives you to drink, drugs or just a heart attack, then the Arsenal are in a league of their own.

Proper teams do not lose a Cup Final by contriving to present the opposition striker with an open goal in the last minute. Proper teams do not draw 3-3 at home having led 3-0 with half an hour to play. Proper teams do not lose 3-2 having been 2-0 up with ten minutes left, nor do they draw 4-4 having led 4-2 with a minute on the clock. Nor, for that matter, do they draw 4-4 having been 4-0 up at half time.

That’s five examples, going back to just six and a half years, of proper Arsenal idiocy.

It doesn’t happen to other clubs, because they aren’t infected with this virus Arsenal have.

It’s kind of like the “Rage” virus which decimates the population of London in 28 Days Later, except that it’s called “Stupid” and is confined to the N5 area of London.

I’d love to think that a strain of it will somehow break out towards north-west London, and the borough of Brent, just in time for 4pm on Sunday but you and I both know it’s not going to happen.

This cross that we bear is ours and ours alone to carry (that’s why you watch other teams, isn’t it? Stress free football).

So, do yourselves a favour and, after Arsenal have committed their latest act of stupid on Sunday afternoon, try and forget that there is a cup final taking place on Sunday that involves two of the most hateful clubs ever.

After all, unless Bane turns up and does this

It’s going to be an anti climax.

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It's a family affair... third generation Gooner, obsessed with Arsenal since the 80's. I've been writing about that obsession and, ever so occasionally, the team since 2004 in a variety of places, but have found a natural home here. As you will find out if you stick around long enough, I am a huge fan of Santi Cazorla. I'm extremely fond of cheese, Marmite, Pipers Salt n' Vinegar crisps, Pilsner Urquell, vodka tonics and absinthe. I am also hopelessly obsessed with Depeche Mode.