David Opsina makes a lot of high-profile errors, but those aren’t the ones that are most concerning.

Over at Cannon Towers we like a joke.

This week, we were discussing if we hired out a plane to fly over the Emirates, what message would each of us choose to share. Apparently I’m something of a broken record; suggestions ranged from “Respect TW14” to “Death to half and half scarves”. And then of course my favourite hobby horse:

“Ospina is not a goalkeeper” and “Colombians (really) can’t jump.”

I mean, obviously Ospina can jump, he just can’t jump high enough, but what’s a banner without a little hyperbole?

It’s all about mistakes, mistakes, and trouble

Everyone makes errors, and it’s an occupational hazard of being a goalkeeper that your mistakes have serious consequences. After all, you’re the last man – there’s no one left to dig you out of that hole. (More on the hole later…) So those mistakes tend to be all the more obvious too.

David Ospina makes a lot of mistakes, for a keeper who only plays a handful of games. He’s probably made a similar number of obvious mistakes as Petr Cech, but in far fewer games.

And some really are glaring.

It’s hard to forget his spectacular moment against Olympiakos when he threw the ball into his own net. Likewise, his failings were all too apparent when he showed such cowardice in the chaos of West Brom’s second goal.

Those howlers are the ones which live long in the memory, of course. But the West Brom game also gave us examples of the type of mistake Ospina makes all too regularly, but which are less remarked upon.

The unpunished errors

At one point, McClean was chasing down a long ball. Ospina hesitated and lost his crucial headstart. Thereafter, he charged out and attempted to collect the ball off the toes of the Baggies’ man, but instead barely managed to avoid bringing him down. Finally he chased after the ball out wide like a headless chicken, leaving it to a defender to clear the resulting ball off the line.

It’s the headless chicken moment which will probably go unscrutinised simply because it didn’t cost Arsenal a goal, but it’s another example of his poor decision making.

Ospina makes far more of these ‘under the radar’ types of mistakes than his peers.

We might be able to think of a few glaring errors Cech has made, but the rest of the time he’s solid. Ospina, however, has a back catalogue of near misses as close as Joe Hart’s Cruyff turn against Germany.

The playing-it-safe errors

On another occassion, a cross was heaved from wide and deep towards Rondon. The striker made contact with the ball inside the six yard area, but Ospina was nowhere to be seen despite the distance the ball had travelled.

When you’re under pressure, that’s when a top goalkeeper can make a real difference by crushing attacks quickly and getting you back on the front foot.

The best keepers in the world are all good at dominating their area, and taking the pressure off their defences. Those keepers will come for balls, knowing that, nine times out of ten, they’ll make a big difference for their team. Occasionally they’ll make a mistake.

Ospina refuses to come out, so that he can ensure that he doesn’t make a single “mistake” in those ten iterations.

But that is a mistake in itself.

An unwillingness, or an inability to weigh up the risk-reward balance is a fatal flaw for a top-level goalkeeper. Maybe at lower league level you want a keeper who is working at 75% capacity but is 100% dependable, but at the top level you want a keeper who is working at 100% capacity even if it means they’re only 90% dependable.

I talked earlier about how a goalkeeper doesn’t have anyone to dig them out of holes, but that is exactly what they can do for their colleagues. If they put themselves out there, they can make saves which make all the difference.

But if they never take that chance, they’re not helping their team like they could.

The just-too-short errors

That brings me on to why Ospina is so reluctant to take a chance – he’s simply too limited physically.

Let’s be completely clear here. I’m not questioning his professionalism, his effort, or even his reactions. I’ve never seen any indication to suggest he’s anything but committed.

But he can’t kick further than halfway, which means we invite pressure back on our defence from our own goalkicks. It also means that there’s no point playing Olivier Giroud when Ospina is between the sticks, because you can’t use him as a target man if you can’t get the ball far enough up to him.

He’s also too small. There are goals we have conceded – for example against Bayern this year, and the one that most sticks in my mind: the Monaco debacle – where he’s reacted fast, given it everything he has, fully extended, and the ball has gone beyond his reach.

Look, I sympathise. I play a sport – netball – where the women playing at international level are all a minimum of 5’9” with most over six feet. I’m 5’3”, 5’4” if I really stretch and give my hair a bit of air. When I lived in New Zealand and went to try out for a local team, they bluntly told me I was too short before they’d even seen me play.

It’s not personal, it’s just telling it as it is.

David Ospina is six foot dead. That makes him the equal shortest goalkeeper in the Premier League, and guess who he shares that honour with? Claudio Bravo. Hardly stellar company.

Someone, somewhere, should just bite the bullet and tell him.

This isn’t sizeist discrimination, it’s just fact

You wouldn’t let a tone deaf person sing the national anthem at the Queen’s Sapphire Jubilee.

You shouldn’t let a six foot man keep goal for a top level football club like The Arsenal.

We have a ready made replacement

He’s 6’5”, he makes brilliant saves (and even saves penalties – imagine that!). Yes, he makes mistakes sometimes, but that’s only because he’s doing everything in his power to perform for his team, and be the difference.

He’s not content with being average, he wants to be the best. He wants to maximise the team’s results, rather than worrying about how his own performances stack up.

He might like a cheeky cigarette, he might like trolling Spurs. But with his Polish cockney accent, his outrageous confidence, and his undeniable character, he’s a fantastic goalkeeper who puts Ospina in the shade.

His name is Wojciech Szczesny, and we should bring him home even if he doesn’t want to come.