Arsenal play Bournemouth at 3pm on Saturday and I for one cannot wait.

As you can tell, I’m being sarcastic. I’m actually in a pit of despair so deep that I’m convinced that the Gunners won’t be able to beat Bournemouth at the Emirates.

Even though the Cherries have lost all three of their matches, which means they’re one of the only teams in the Premier League actually doing worse than us at the moment – rejoice! – I don’t know many Gooners that are actually confident going into the game.

Arsenal’s last clash was a 4-0 loss away to Liverpool so surely is has to get better?

So, what can we expect from Arsenal’s fourth league clash of the 2017/18 season?

A seven-goal thrilled? A stagnant shambles? Who honestly knows at this point?

As it stands, it doesn’t look as if the team or manager really know what they’re doing, none of the players want to be there and the atmosphere at the Emirates is bound to be completely toxic.

Oh, and I miss Santi Cazorla.

5. Alexis pretending to like Arsenal… or not

Alexis appeared to be laughing on the bench as Arsenal were thrashed 4-0 by Liverpool [via Sky Sports]

After the whole Transfer Deadline Day drama in which Alexis was supposed to be signing for Manchester City and didn’t, it’ll be interesting to see what kind of reception he get when he steps out against Bournemouth.

It’ll also be interesting to see how he react to being kidnapped by Wenger and his cronies.

Will he be a professional and actually play well?

4. Arsenal’s attempt at the 3-4-3 formation

LIVERPOOL, ENGLAND – AUGUST 27: Sead Kolasinac of Arsenal looks on from the bench during the Premier League match between Liverpool and Arsenal at Anfield on August 27, 2017 in Liverpool, England. (Photo by Michael Regan/Getty Images)

Right, we’ve got all of our centre-backs up and running now. Enough of this silliness. Can we please start playing Sead Kolasinac as a wing-back?

That’s if Arsene Wenger doesn’t bench him again…

3. Arsenal’s club record signing on the bench

(Photo by Steve Bardens/Getty Images)

Is £52m Alexandre Lacazette still in his ‘adaptation period’ or is he alright to actually play against the Cherries?

2. The camera slowly zooming in on a stressed Wenger

LONDON, ENGLAND – AUGUST 11: Arsene Wenger, Manager of Arsenal and his assistant coach Steve Bould look on during the Premier League match between Arsenal and Leicester City at the Emirates Stadium on August 11, 2017 in London, England. (Photo by Shaun Botterill/Getty Images)

I’m convinced Arsene Wenger will never look happy or carefree again.

1. Heaps of empty seats

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A twenty-something writer living in North London. Likes caffeine, food that’s bad for her and Arsenal. Dislikes avocados, rudeness and Arsenal.