Ahead of the north London derby this weekend, I thought I’d take a look at some of the things I dislike most about Tottenham.

This could have been a very long list, so I restricted it otherwise I’d still have been typing at kick-off.

Let’s start with the one I hate the most at present:

2Harry Kane’s luck

LONDON, ENGLAND - OCTOBER 29: Harry Kane of Tottenham Hotspur during the Premier League match between Tottenham Hotspur and Manchester City at Wembley Stadium on October 29, 2018 in London, United Kingdom. (Photo by Clive Rose/Getty Images)
LONDON, ENGLAND – OCTOBER 29: Harry Kane of Tottenham Hotspur during the Premier League match between Tottenham Hotspur and Manchester City at Wembley Stadium on October 29, 2018 in London, United Kingdom. (Photo by Clive Rose/Getty Images)

The ultimate goalhanger who hopes something bounces off three players, hits his arse and goes in.

Pierre-Emerick Aubameyang is better, has scored more (4 in 5 against Spurs alone) and isn’t a diving little sh*t. Tottenham turned him down before he signed for Dortmund (while he was a fully grown human unlike Harry Kane being rejected at Arsenal when he was a tubby 10-year-old).

Yeah, yeah, he’s better than we feared he might be, that still doesn’t mean he isn’t hateful.